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  • Writer's pictureSelena Frongillo

How Well Do You Really Know Yourself?

find yourself

When asked, "tell me a little bit about yourself", many of us can spit out an elevator pitch of where we went to school, what we do for a living, and what we like to do in our free time. But, is this who we really are? How well do we really know ourselves? Does the school we graduated from, our career, and our hobbies truly define us?

Elementary through high school sets us up to think about what we want to do. How do we want to make an impact on the world? What path do we want to choose and stick to for the rest of our lives? And, well, how will we make money?

We are taught with a "what can I do" mindset rather than a "who can I be" mindset. Our job does not reflect who we are at our core. Of course, you can get an idea of our interests and skills through our career path and hobbies, but what many of us fail to realize is this isn't what makes us, us.

So, you're probably thinking, well what the heck does then?! I'm here to give you 45 questions to really get to the core of who you are - let's meet ourselves, shall we?

Character Traits

  1. Am I a night owl or an early bird? What life choices can I make to best suit this?

  2. What are my strengths? What about weaknesses?

  3. What are my values? What do I believe in?

  4. Am I an introvert, an extrovert or a mix of both?

  5. What are my non-negotiables for my life?

  6. Am I afraid to speak my mind?

  7. What is my biggest pet peeve?

  8. Am I a giving person? How can I be more giving?


  1. What are my short-term goals? How about long-term?

  2. What do I like to do for fun?

  3. What new activities am I interested in trying?

  4. If I could have one wish, it would be ____.

  5. What am I passionate about?

  6. What excites me?

  7. What do I need to be my happiest self?


  1. How can I uplift my mood when I'm feeling down?

  2. What makes me cry?

  3. Which words can annoy me?

  4. What makes me anxious?

  5. What makes me mad?

  6. What makes me laugh?

  7. Which type of joke makes me feel offended?

  8. What scares me the most?

  9. Which childhood memory makes me happy and which makes me sad?

  10. What am I worried about?

  11. What am I ashamed of?

Diving Deep

  1. Are there people I still need to forgive?

  2. Are there things that I still need to forgive myself for?

  3. Which past experiences still bother me?

  4. What are some of the biggest mistakes I've made and what did I learn?

  5. What impact do I want to have on the world?

  6. How do I want people to remember me?

  7. What do I want to be able to do before I die?

  8. What do my dreams tell me?

  9. Who makes me feel safe?

  10. Do you have any regrets? If so, what are they?

  11. If you had one year left to live, what would you do with it?

  12. What is my proudest accomplishment?

  13. What are some things you've had to unlearn?

Looking Forward

  1. Do I want children?

  2. Where do I want to live?

  3. What can I see myself doing every day until I retire?

  4. Are there things about myself I want to improve on for the future? What are they?

  5. How can I be the best friend, partner, employee, neighbor, etc.? What does this look like?

  6. How can I make what time I have left here count?

Like I said - we all may think we know ourselves, until we're slapped with the hard-hitting questions that reveal just a little bit more than how we make a living, and what our weekends tend to look like. Grab a journal, and answer these questions - you never know what you'll find out about yourself!

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1 Comment

Jun 04, 2021

I think you're absolutely right that we are taught that our value is derived from what we can do, not who we are, and that who we are is defined by our capabilities. But our abilities is just one part of who we are. Our feelings are so important to our make up. They impact our perspective and vice versa. I loved all of these questions you've asked. I'm saving them for later. They're great kernels for future blog posts and great questions for the podcast I'm launching 😍. Thank you!

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