• Selena Frongillo

Stop Caring, Start Living

Updated: Jan 21


girl at cliffs of moher

Hey, hey, welcome back to The Shower Thoughts Series! Today's shower thought hits deep for many. It actually came during a conversation with a friend, as we discussed caring about other people's perceptions of us. We are raised to believe that how we portray ourselves to the world is important, therefore, other's opinions of us is important. This seems to supersede our own perception of ourselves, as we seek approval solely from our friends, family, and peers. What is that? Who started this? The first thing we should be teaching our youth is that your opinion of yourself is really the only opinion that matters. Seems simple enough, right? So we'd think.


When you think about it, most of the things we worry about have to do with what others think of us. What would a world look like if no one cared about what anyone else thought? If you only did what made you happy, without anyone else's influence weighing on you?


We all know people (and maybe we are these people) who have married the person they thought their parents would approve of, accepted a job that would look good on their resume, or agreed with their friends on a topic that they feel passionately against - all to avoid the dreaded word: judgement. And who the hell has the right to judge, anyways? We all have faults, we all have opinions - shouldn't we stick by them without the fear of receiving criticism?


Fear of judgment only holds us back from being our truest selves and pursuing our true desires. What if I cared about what people thought so much that I didn't start this blog? What if you didn't download Bumble and find the love of your life? What if you didn't quit the job you hate, drop everything, and move to London for a year? Our life is about choices - many of them, others are all-too-eager to jump in and give their two cents (did we even ask?...). Yet, whose opinion do we usually care about the most? THOSE PEOPLE. Why is it that all too often, we don't ask ourselves what we should do? How about we look inwards once in a while (no actually, way more than once in a while)?


The more we allow other people's opinions to affect our decisions, the less we even know what we want anymore. Why is that? Oh yeah, because every decision we've made has been based on every other person but ourselves. We can't control other people's thoughts or reactions, but we act in a way that we think will please the people around us. Well, what about the most important person around you? The only one you will have your entire life - you, you, you! The quicker we learn this the better off we will be.


And another thing - anyone who judges you or fights you tooth and nail over decisions you make...please hold the door open for those people. Their negativity, and irrelevant opinions are not needed nor wanted. The only people you want around you are the people that lift you up, support you, and truly want what is in your best interest. Yes, you can care a little bit about what these people think. However, remember that the most important person's opinion of you and your choices is you. Quit the job, make the YouTube channel, end the friendship. Let's start caring about what we think about our lives - and only that. Do you struggle with caring about people's opinions of you? Shoot me a message and I'd love to chat. Thanks for reading, and I'll see you in my next post!

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